If you don’t have a bedtime routine for your toddler yet, you’re missing out on a valuable tool for managing your little one during some of the most trying hours of the day.

Studies have shown that a consistent bedtime routine of bath, massage and quiet activities can promote improvements in several aspects of toddler sleep quality, night wakings, bedtime behaviour – and yes, maternal mood. If that doesn’t make you want to start a good bedtime routine, I don’t know what will!

If we weren’t strict with anything with our kids, sticking to a decent bedtime was one of them. Having that time to myself, even if it was to catch up on housework or cooking, used to make me feel human again 😆

Here are some tips on setting up a good toddler bedtime routine that will help your child establish good sleeping patterns – while helping you keep your cool!

1. Set the right environment

One important part of a good bedtime routine for toddler and baby is setting the right environment to foster sleep. Dim the lights in your home after dinner or bathtime, and turn off the TV and other distractions. If you use white noise while your toddler sleeps, now is a good time to turn it on in the background.

2. Make a warm bath and massage part of the routine

A warm bath is a great way to encourage your toddler to start unwinding. Dimming the lights slightly (but not so much that you can’t see well) helps to set the tone. After bathtime, a gentle massage can relax your baby further. In the study I cited earlier, the researchers found success with a simple routine of a bath followed by a massage and some quiet activities, with lights turned out within half an hour of the end of the bath.

3. Stick to quiet play

After your toddler’s bath, you may still have some downtime before your targeted sleeping hour. Be sure you spend this time engaging in quiet play, like reading a book in a soft voice or quietly cuddling and singing. Avoid stimulating activities in the 30 to 60 minutes before bedtime, especially activities that involve screens, like watching TV.

4. Be consistent

As your child gets older, you may need to adjust the routine, but try to keep it fairly consistent from day to day and preserve the same order of activities to get your child in sleep mode. Some experts suggest that the success of a bedtime routine for kids is more about the predictability and rhythm of it than the actual composition of it – as long as it’s within reason and not too stimulating.

5. Use a security object

For toddlers, a security blanket or stuffed animal “lovey” can play an important role in a good bedtime routine by reminding them of sleep and providing bedtime comfort. It can also help with separation anxiety, soothing your child when you leave their bedroom for the night. Of course, you need to choose an object that is safe to keep in your child’s bed and won’t pose a suffocation risk, and try to reserve it for bedtime and naps only to build a stronger association with sleep.

6. Keep your cool

Toddlers look to their parents for cues on how to behave and interact, and if you’re stressed beyond belief, there’s a good chance your child will follow your lead. If you regularly lose your cool in the evenings, try to find a way to calm yourself down before things get out of control. If possible, ask your partner to spend time with your toddler so you can take a few minutes to yourself before starting the routine and use this time for whatever grounds you – some quick yoga, a few pages of a good book, or a soothing cup of tea.

Mega tip: Cook dinner a day before

One of my best tips for frazzled mums is making dinner after your toddler has gone to bed for the night to eat the following day. There really is so much going on at this age during the evening hours that adding cooking to the mix creates so much additional and unnecessary stress. 

When you’ve already made your dinner the night before, you’ll always be able to serve dinner at a decent hour, which means you won’t have to deal with the stress of dragging out bedtime with a clingy toddler. You can even get more than one dinner out of your efforts by using a slow cooker for batch cooking. If your toddler doesn’t go to bed early enough for your slow cooker meal to finish cooking before your own bedtime, you can take advantage of the evening quiet to get all the prep done. Then, you can just toss everything into the slow cooker when you wake up, and set it and forget it!