More often than not, we’re guilty of letting self-care take a backseat. But, in times of uncertainty, and especially now with the overwhelm of having kids in school or not — self-care? What’s that?

The stark reality is that we let the situation be our excuse. Our intentions are good, but we need to take a moment and realise that this is not helping. On the contrary, saying no to self care because we’re frazzled is counterproductive. Not only are we not taking the time to soothe our bodies and brains, but we’re giving up our strength in place of helplessness. We’re letting the situation dictate the way we live. And that is not ideal.

Lately I have come to realise that I’ve been unknowingly practicing mental self-care. It probably stems from the fact that I fought anxiety (on the brink of depression) a few years ago, through cognitive behaviour therapy (CBT), and since then, I’ve come out feeling stronger and determined not to let anxiety get the best of me again.

Here are some ways you can work on some mental self-care in times of uncertainty (this is what works for me 🙂 )

1. Stop doubting yourself

Whatever decision you’ve taken in terms of schooling for your kids, you’ve taken in the best interests of you and your family. It is personal, and not comparable to anyone else’s. And, you considered all aspects before deciding and did the best you could.
Regardless of this, we still wonder, and worse – stress ourselves out thinking whether we made the right decision.
Keep two things in mind: you’d be doubting yourself relentlessly regardless of if you’d taken the other route, and know on is forcing you to not change your mind at any point down the line. If you wonder if you took the right decision, it’s not set in stone.

2. Stick to logic

It’s only natural that we tend to lead with our emotions when things start to happen. As much as we prepared ourselves that it was a matter of ‘when and not if’, we’re never really prepared for when a case hits close to home. It’s happened to me. My first reaction was to let my emotions and feelings take over and get the best of me, and I started to panic. I’m learning to let myself feel all the feels yet remember that I need to think logically in such situations. Are my kids in more danger than they were yesterday? No. Are the proper precautions being taken? Yes.
Focusing on the logic really helps you to feel in control. Because you are. Contrary to popular belief being in control doesn’t mean having control over a situation. Being in control means having control over your thoughts. And this is just what thinking logically will do for you.
Which brings me to my next point…

3. Stay in control

We might not have control over what is happening, but we do have some semblance of control over other things in our life. For me, that is planning my meals and cooking nutritious food to sustain us and also enjoy eating. Funnily enough, having control over my meals makes me feel in control overall, and gives me confidence, and of course makes me happy.
Sidenote: If you have young kids I suggest you not try and regiment something that you know is not sustainable when you have littles. Such as keeping the house tidy at all times. Try and pick something that you can do without interrupting their schedule, such as organising your family calendar to a t, streamlining your chore list, organising the laundry room, and so on.

4. Live

Sure, life might be crazy right now, but that doesn’t mean we should stop living. We’ve got a LOT going on, like most of you, but I didn’t let this fact stop me from doing what I really want to do. Whatever you set out to do, there is never the perfect time. So I’m not letting the pandemic get in my way.
Just to bring you in behind the scenes, I really wanted to sign up to a fitness program to shed a few kilos, tone up, and regroup. I wanted to exercise regularly. And I wanted to go all in and make a commitment because that’s when things get super serious for me. The one I wanted to join started on the very same date my 5 day challenge started. And the very first week the kids were back in school. Add a personal family issue we were faced with, and I could have very easily said no. I could have backed out. But instead, I thought about the whole thing. Did I want it bad enough? Yes. Would I have to work harder? Of course. But could I do it? Absolutely.
12 days on and we’ve had a mega successful challenge, the kids are settled in school, we’ve settled into our routines, I’ve lost some weight, enjoying working out 5 days a week and feeling AWESOME.

We’ve been lucky enough to have been blessed with 33 years (of course if you’re older, more), of no major crisis in Malta. I’ve never experienced wars, natural disasters, or anything of the sort. You might think I’m being drastic, but the truth is nothing was a given in this lifetime. We’re not entitled to a life without hiccups. We feel entitled because we know no different, but this is part of the human experience.

So let’s count our blessings – because gratitude is also known to improve mental wellbeing and our overall health ❤️

Happy Friday supermama!

Love,

Nakita xxx

PS: Dinner in a Flash is open for enrolment till Sunday. Don’t miss out on it if you really, honestly, truly want to save time planning, prepping, and cooking good food. Come and join us, you’ll be glad you did! More info here.