Just as I thought that I had managed to instil a routine of sorts for my eldest, Yanik, who is 11 going on to 12 – along comes secondary school and shocks me into the few first changes of many that are around the corner.

For those not familiar with the term secondary school, this is also referred to as Year 7, the year when our once innocent children go on to another school for older kids and start morphing into a not too distant memory of teenage rebellion.

One term in, and I’ve learnt a great many things!

  1. I need to stock up on hair gel, hairspray and a hair comb.  Or 3 of each, just in case God forbid they run out or are lost somewhere in a not-so-organised bedroom.  Oh, and I desperately need to get another hairdryer…
  2. Allocate bathroom time every morning (15 minutes max) to my tween.  This will avoid having other family members huffing and puffing and going back and forth in exasperation.
  3. The ten odd years of preparing my kid for school day in day out have in no way prepared me for the massive change in the school routine.  I feel like I am sending a 3 year old to big school.  If I’m stressed out, I wonder what my poor kid feels like?!
  4. My child is only stressed out from day 1 to 3.  Once he gets the routine, and all the ways one can just slightly slack without sticking out like a sore thumb, he will relax.  Too darn much for my liking.
  5. Which brings me to my next point…this makes me even more stressed.  Arrghh!
  6. Once a handy tool for contacting my son when he is not with me, the mobile phone is now my number one enemy.  Strings of ‘Whatsapp’ conversations rudely interrupt my line of thought tens of times a day by emitting a flashing light every few seconds.
  7. I need to hide my number one enemy (the mobile phone), for him to be able to concentrate on his homework.  Unless he needs to ask his friends something or other to continue of course…
  8. I need to conduct a full body search in the (recurring) event that my child needs to use the loo.  ‘It’s an emergency!’ – I hear him wail; in frantic effort to escape into the respite of the bathroom walls only to produce my number one enemy hidden in his sock.  Be very aware…
  9. Girls ceased to exist in my son’s world just months ago.  They are now the talk of the moment.  They spring up on me on every corner at secondary school meetings with huge smiles pasted on their faces asking if I am Yanik’s mother.  Here comes trouble…
  10. Finally I’ve perfected the art of breathing.  Irrational behaviour and demands are thrown in my direction 24/7.  Breathe in, breathe out…

Nakita xxx